So, an unusual and interesting thing happened today. I left the Missionary Training Center. Twice.
take pictures, and have a change of scenery. That was a lot of fun, although it was pretty hot and our quick pace
We took a shuttle from the front entrance to the doctor’s office and tried not to lose our composure. We didn’t know what was wrong with Sister Bolander and we were all worried that it was contagious, although I was trying not to worry/think/talk about that and add more stress to the situation. We got there and she went in and Sister Liu and I waited in the sitting area. All of a sudden everything felt extra real and really overwhelming.
Sister Liu, in that moment, did what I would have probably done in her position.
She asked me how I was doing. All I had to do was say, ” Um…” and I felt everything bubble up inside and come out as tears. And I told her. Honestly. I was tired. I was hungry (it was Fast Sunday, as well), I was really missing home. And then I told her that I was afraid of something that felt silly but was really important to me: the possibility that my almost 13 year old dog might pass away before I got home. I expressed that I was worried I wouldn’t be a good missionary because I felt inadequate in just about every way possible, especially because I felt like I didn’t know enough or even knew how to learn what I need to know. Just… everything. And the worry that I had about Sister Bolander being ill, and about stress in general. Not a foreign concept for any missionary, or any human being, for that matter.
But she just reassured me that I knew more than I think and that I’ve been an example to her. I felt better, hearing that, but what honestly really pulled me out of worry two missionary experiences waiting to happen right there in the waiting room of that little doctor’s office in Provo, UT.
The other was a young expectant mother. She was really sweet. Her name is Aubrey and she wants to name the baby Aiden. She was really friendly to us and we talked for a little bit about pregnancy and doctors and things like that. Surface stuff. But it was good just to talk to her. Everyone has a story that matters. Everyone has a potential relationship with God, and He loves all of them. That’s why, as missionaries, it’s our job not to make judgements on who needs to hear the gospel or not. EVERYONE needs to hear it. It’s our job to make that possible.
Sister Bolander finally came out and reported that it was just a virus. We had a prescription to pick up and she needed rest. Pretty standard.
Tuesday, September 3:
Long story short, Sister Bolander was fine and got the prescription from RiteAid. We also got the tour of that tiny portion of Provo. But honestly, after being ONLY on the small campus of the MTC, for what has felt like weeks instead of just days, it was like we were seeing the world! We missed more of the evening’s activities, but we were able to come back and have a productive planning session and companionship inventory.
So much has happened since then. It is so much that I can hardly remember any of it. But one main thing is that I’ve sort of noticed a theme here at the MTC. You know how in Boise there’s the joke that, “If you don’t like the weather here, just wait a few hours, and maybe you will?” Especially in the winter? Well, in the MTC, if you don’t like your emotional status (or even if you do), just wait a few hours – it’ll turn right around. Almost guaranteed. Whether you are comfortable or uncomfortable, prepare for table-turning in the near future.
That’s something that has been specifically hard. I feel like I experience some kind of artificial bi-polar reaction to every day. One moment I’m at what feels like the lowest point possible, and the next I’m lifted and encouraged by the Spirit. Then I’m straight back to a “rock-bottom.” It’s become clear that that’s something I’ll need to learn to manage or I’ll be in trouble. The only question is how. We had a stress-management class a few days ago and talked about meditation, as well as prayer, and just working hard at making the Spirit one of your BEST FRIENDS. It’s called the comforter for a reason. It’s with you the most when you need the most comfort and guidance, and it’s a little quieter when you’re comfortable and on the right track. That’s a really beautiful thing. I know that I’ve needed comfort on a daily if not hourly basis while here at the MTC, so I am so grateful for that truth. And I do know it is true.
We’ve had some really great experiences. Just the other day, we had the most wonderful opportunity to meet and teach a man named Junichi Maeda. He’s from… JAPAN! The people we teach are just volunteers that come to the MTC to allow the missionaries to practice meeting and teaching. Some are members who are playing the role of someone who is investigating the gospel, or just interested. Some are converts to the church who are just re-living, essentially, their conversion story, and some are legitimately investigators. That was both exciting and scary. It was so cool to be meeting him. The MTC is placing a lot of faith in our ability to teach by and with the Spirit by allowing us to teach when we are so new to all of this.
But he’s from Japan and we talked about a lot of things, but specifically, we talked about temples and family traditions. I mentioned to him that my mother had served a mission in Japan and he was so interested to hear about that. We talked about music and families, and so many things and he invited us to come visit him when we get off our missions so he could make us traditional Japanese food. He then asked us to sing a hymn. I can’t describe the feeling that experience gave us. The feeling in that room was unbelievable. The Spirit was so strong and it was confirmed to me, again, how powerful music is. We sang “I Need Thee Every Hour” and harmonized and just basked in the beautiful feeling that filled the room: the beautiful peace that only comes from the Spirit, the Holy Ghost. We left and he gave us drops of peppermint essential oils that helped us be able to breathe easier.
Anyway, I have to go now, but I wanted to report that everything is wonderful. Everything is going well. I’m great, and I am loving this work.
I look forward to hearing from you all, if you have time to write! I leave the MTC on September 18th, and love mail! Don’t forget about DearElder.com. It’s one of the best things ever.